Yearly Archives: 2011

Our first conversation this morning went something like this:

“Hey dude, there’s these little black bugs all over the bathroom…”

” (crunch, crunch goes the Cinnamon Toast Crunch) Like, ants?”

“I don’t know. Maybe. They’re tiny little black bugs. I guess they could be ants. But they’re everywhere.”

” (looking) Oh hey, look at that. Yup, those are ants.”

“But they weren’t here last night before we went to bed. It’s like they literally appeared overnight.”

“They did.”

“Ummmm?”

“We turned on the a.c. for the first time last night. They’re like me. They like the cold.”

“Huh.”

Spraying the walls, baseboards, windows and cabinets in the entire house for ants, it’s how everyone likes to spend their Wednesday morning before work. Am I right? We expect them to make a hasty and non-returning exit from our residence by this afternoon. I reopened my bathroom cabinet about 30 minutes later to find a pile of a dozen or so dead ants at the base of my Listerine bottle. Tasty.

On a slightly less critter-infested note, I was awarded Employee of the Month yesterday. Likely for being the least offensive person in April. A real shock, I know. Most enticing is the fact that this honor comes with a prize of the “treat of your choice,” for which I chose Oreo truffles (recipe here).

These are more than easy enough to make on my own, but if someone else wants to do it for me, so be it. Award happily accepted. These balls of magnificence are truly awesome. I suggest you make and devour them immediately. Girl’s night anyone?

Also, have you seen today’s Google image? A tribute to dancer and choreographer Martha Graham, mother of modern/contemporary dance, on the celebration of her 117th birthday. I always get a little giddy to see artsy achievements properly boasted and celebrated in our society. I danced in Orchesis, a modern dance company, for three years at Texas State University. I instantly recognized this morning’s fun animation as that of dance and was pleased.

To keep you updated, same old same old. More working for both of us – jobs, road cases, job hunting, arts ed. work – more honeymoon research. More anticipating the arrival of summer and all the fun things that will happen. In keeping with my recently-started tradition, I’d like to enlighten you with some open letters to the public. My favorites!

Dear Cincinnati Drivers:

A red light, especially one that has been red for several seconds already, means STOP. To the two fools I witnessed zooming through an already red light on Beechmont Avenue this morning at about 8:57…what were you thinking? I stopped. You should have too. Furthermore, FAIL. Learn to drive without endangering the rest of civilization or get off the road.

P.S. A chihuahua is not an appropriate driver’s side window accessory.

Sincerely,

Lara

Dear Cincinnati Weather Gods,

Let’s talk about this humidity for a minute, shall we? See, Texas is hot. Ohio is humid. It may only be in the upper 70s or low 80s, but the humidity makes everything sticky, my skin shiny, my hair unruly and my husband grouchy. Please tone it down a bit. This is just one of those things nobody warns you about when you move to a new place. On a positive note, thanks for not snowing!

Sincerely,

Lara

Dear Modcloth, Lulu’s, 6PM, GoJane, ShopRuche, Dillards, Macy’s and Nordstrom Rack,

So many adorable dresses, so little money!! Please send me free dresses.

Sincerely,

Lara

Dear Ross stores,

I appreciate your cute dresses too. But mostly I appreciate the fact that you are cheap and therefore I could probably afford a few new frocks for our honeymoon vacay. Why are you not in Ohio again? Please franchise to Cincinnati. See you in Texas!

Sincerely,

Lara

Dear Blackberry crop,

You are fantastic this year. I eat about a bag of you for lunch daily. Keep up the good work. In fact, if you stay this delicious I’ll award you a Berry of the Month certificate and the obligatory Oreo Truffle prize as well. I think that’s fair incentive. I mean, worked for me.

P.S. I love you!

Sincerely,

Lara

Did you watch the Kentucky Derby? We did. All that money, hype, and lengthy preparations for a little over two minutes of race time. Impressive, isn’t it? A few months back we were actually considering shelling out the fairly minimal entrance fee for the standing-room-only section at the Derby grounds where you don’t actually see the race live (though TV’s are positioned throughout) but you do get to stand and line the pathway that the horses and their jockeys take as they parade toward the starting line. Unfortunately work intervened with that plan, but there’s always next year. We’d love to go to the derby next year just to experience the excitement of an event of that caliber. I was rooting for the female jockey and her horse “Pants on Fire.” We should take a moment to discuss the names of these horses. Who names them and WHY? Pants on Fire, Mucho Macho Man, Animal Kingdom…those poor horses. At least they look fantastic! So muscular and such shiny coats! Oh, and the hats! Did you see some of the hats at this shindig? With the close timing proximity of the Royal Wedding to the Kentucky Derby this is without a doubt ludicrous hat season. Major works of art, to say the least. My glamorous floppy-brimmed black sun hat that I’m planning to don on our honeymoon (because, let’s be honest, where else is it an appropriate accessory?) absolutely pales in comparison to the other creations out there. Good stuff, my friends!
 
Meanwhile, Ted (with a little bit of my help) has been putting together his workshop in our garage. He got a road-case building gig for a band from Wisconsin that he’s working on right now and last year he built a bunch of them for MSU’s theatre department as well. He makes fantastic road-cases! Really top quality, great looking, excellently fitting, sturdy cases to securely transport and protect tools, cables, lighting and audio equipment, etc. It would be a neat side business for his company TOR Ventures, in addition to his lighting designs and light rentals. He enjoys the work and it would turn a respectable profit if he can get his name out there. But even with the plethora of tools Ted already owns, it takes some heavy-duty machinery to construct these things. Enter the new chop saw with extending stand, bench drill press, and tool cabinet that have recently made their way into our home. Good investments indeed! Ted’s finally on his way to a fully functioning shop of sorts, which is something he’s wanted for a very long time. I occasionally miss a lot of the set-constructing work I used to do as an intern at BoarsHead – drilling, sawing, bolting, painting – so having the tools around is kind of fun for me too. Last night I helped Ted make a wooden table top for his new drill press and at nights I’ll probably help him with other stuff too. I’ll try to remember to post a picture of Ted’s new in-the-works shop.
 
We had a cold snap last week, but with the weather finally starting to clear up and the surprising absence of rain lately (I may be jinxing myself here), we’re finally getting to enjoy the great outdoors. Our lawn in still growing by the minute, so most of that great outdoors time is spent mowing, but we went for a short bike ride yesterday evening (Ted’s reminding me how to properly use bike gears on a hilly terrain because I was like, 10, and on flat ground the last time I used bike gears) and there’s hope of bonfires, cookouts on the grill, and bike riding and rollerblading in our future as well – probably in June once the CCM students are out for the summer and we both have some free nights and weekends again.
 
But we do have some really exciting things to look forward to this summer! For Memorial Day weekend at the end of May my sister and her family will be visiting us in Cincinnati. Four days after that I’ll be heading to San Antonio for the first weekend in June to see my family and friends. Ted’s sister and her family are slated to spend the 4th of July weekend with us in Cincy, then there’s a hopeful quick weekend trip to Lansing sometime in July (if we can get away!), our fabulous honeymoon at the end of August, and our 1-year anniversary weekend in Door County that will likely take place in September instead of October because of the CCM production schedule. Christmas will be in Texas, New Year’s Eve in Wisconsin and the jury is out on Thanksgiving, again depending on how much time we can get off for Thanksgiving. All perfectly excellent things to look forward to! And a lot of fun planning coming our way.
 
What are you looking forward to in the coming months?

There’s a lot going on in the world – in our own little one and the world at large. I’ve been neglectful. Do you forgive me?

Patriotic emotions run high lately, with the devastating tornado outbreaks in the south (I have a very close friend attending grad school at the University of Alabama in Tuscaloosa, the hardest hit city. Fortunately, she and all of her pets were okay, but her house was literally right outside the line of the monster tornado – as in, she could see it and feel it because it was just one street over. A close call indeed), the announcement of the capture of Osama Bin Laden, and let’s not forget the Royal Wedding circus. There’s an awful lot to be thankful for.

In our little corner of the globe we’re still seeing rain nearly every day. You’d think we’re living in Seattle or Alaska. It rains so much that the earth is constantly soggy and our lawn needs to be mowed at least once a week or the grass gets too high for my optimal bunny and cat spotting preferences. It grows inches every week. On the rare free nights when we actually decide to try to keep up with our elderly riding-lawn-mower-and-gardening-fanatic neighbors so we don’t have the most embarrassing lawn on the block, my job is to run around the back, side, and front of the house and collect all the tree branches that have flowed into our yard or been ripped off the trees in our nightly storms so that Ted can safely mow. We have quite the system going and an excellent pile of impressively large branches gathered by the side fence. I smell a bonfire with peep s’mores coming up any day now!

In addition to us both working full-time jobs and keeping up with the house, I’ve been actively and often applying for permanent theatre jobs in the greater Cincinnati area as they come up and just recently began serving as the Education Outreach Manager for this fantastic non-profit movement-based performing and educational arts company’s new education department while Ted secured himself a road-case building gig for a band from Wisconsin. We’ve been busy. To top it all off the honeymoon research and planning has officially begun, with all its fun excitements and discoveries, and budgeting heartbreaks and headaches. Slowly but surely, we’re making decisions and getting there (we think).

I’d also like to take a moment to thank the U.S. government for charging an outrageous $180 for me to simply change my last name on my perfectly valid and completely un-expired passport so that we can actually have a honeymoon. Thank you, government, for that totally asinine and utterly ridiculous policy of charging so much to do so little. My sincerest, most heartfelt appreciation for that lovely wedding gift.

In our limited spare time, we’ve still managed to squeeze in a little R&R. A few nights ago we drove over to Olive Garden for a date night to use up the rest of an Olive Garden gift card we received last Christmas in the family gift card exchange. While it poured outside we sat warm and dry inside, serenaded by romantic Italian lilts, and dined on the infamous soup, salad and bread sticks meal-extraordinaire. In between bites we snagged two of the kids’ “keep busy” booklets and a pack of crayons from the basket right by our table (as you can see, this was entirely their fault for placing it within our reach) and filled out cheesy Italian vacation postcard mad-libs, word unscrambles, and maze puzzles. It was glorious. Another night we tuned in for an episode of one of our favorite TV shows then got the urge for a late-night malt & milkshake run. We hopped in the truck, while it rained, and ended up at Steak & Shake for a chocolate malt and strawberry milkshake. I’m sure you’ll be relieved to know that I created fabulous placemat artwork there as well. Click the picture to enlarge the genius that is my handiwork.

On Thursday night we were invited to attend an invited dress for Cincinnati Ballet’s Infamous Love Songs dance production at the Aranoff Center. Since the Aranoff is downtown we hit up Potbelly’s sandwich shop in Fountain Square and witnessed a truly first-class freak wind and rain storm (are you noticing the pattern here?) that sent students, businessman, and sightseers scrambling for cover. We enjoyed the great work of the dancers, designers and live Cincinnati-based band and singer called Over the Rhine (named for the inner-city suburb of Cincy). The production was a hodge-podge of ballet, modern and jazz to some really nifty songs. Definitely worth seeing!

Somewhere in between all of that we used a Groupon and took both vehicles for a thorough interior and exterior washing, vacuuming and polishing and I’ve taken a few bike rides through the upper-crust Markley neighborhoods by our house on my occasional day off. I’m wishing the weather would clear up for longer than a few hours or a day at a time so Ted and I can pack the bikes and our roller blades in the truck and head out for several hours to Bass Island for a respectable bike ride.

I’m off work today and tomorrow, cleaning the house, doing the laundry, grocery shopping, preparing some (hopefully) really delicious meals, starting in on the education outreach work, and doing some vacation planning. We’ll see what comes of it all, but I just wanted to drop by to ease fears that since I haven’t blogged for three days that I’m probably dead.

We are alive and well and thankful for it.

P.S. – I do intend to get back to blogging more regularly during the summer. As in, not this week. But I’ll be by every few days to enlighten you with all manner of random nonsense.

P.P.S. – The picture of our finished, clean, organized, and shelved basement I promised. Disco ball not included. You have no idea how hard it is to get a great picture of a disco ball in motion.

Much to the delight of nearly everyone, albeit for different reasons, the highly anticipated Royal Wedding is here! This morning when we turned on the news I excitedly proclaimed something to the effect of “Thank You Kate Middleton for finally bringing class back into the bridal fashion industry!” while Ted exclaimed “Thank God this crap is finally over and we can stop hearing about it!” See, different reasons.

And this gorgeous dress? This beautiful veil?

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Stunning, classy, and graceful. And that we could both agree on. I wouldn’t have expected her to walk into Westminster bare-armed, so the wrist-length lace sleeves with a plunging yet modest neckline and sweetheart bodice was a beautiful combination of traditional and modern. Channeling Grace Kelly? Always a good choice. I think we can all agree she looked lovely. Though I think it’s pretty clear I’ve been a fan of elegant gowns with sleeves and a few modern, standout details for quite some time now. Out with the overly-popular, hideous, strapless see-through numbers and in with the vintage classics with updated statement-making designs please!

Because I live in Ohio and all my friends live in Texas, I’m missing out a real party opportunity here. I’d have sent out lavishly-crafted and fancily-scripted invitations and, my friends and I, we’d gussy up in our own wedding dresses, veils, shoes, and jewelry (or previously-worn bridesmaid frocks) and dine on a scrumptious menu of tea with milk and sugar, scones with lemon curd and clotted cream, cucumber and egg salad sandwiches, champagne cupcakes, and lamb with mint jelly tortes, all served on fine china, while we watch a DVR’d recording of the blessed event. Alas, I live (friendless) in Cincy and they live (heat-struck) in San Antonio. Therefore, I’ll be settling (rough life, I know) for a Friday night of homemade Italian casserole, lawn-moving, bike riding, and re-runs of the Big Bang Theory and Modern Family with my Price Charming.

Though my wedding dress may or may not make a surprise appearance for a quick lap around the house tonight. Don’t judge.

Rain check for June, friends?

(Cue resounding “YES!” comments on this post. Do it.)

Dear Self,

Yawn, yawn, yawn! You haven’t taken a nap in well over seven months. This is outright abuse considering you dearly relish a good afternoon nap like no other. You get two days off a week, and yes, while there’s a house to keep clean, groceries to buy, laundry to do, meals to cook, new jobs to search out, things to be researched, and work to be completed, there’s also naps to be taken. In the sun with the windows open so a cool, fresh breeze can blow through. No more skimping! Doctor’s orders.

Sincerely,

Lara

P.S. – And get thee to an orange tabby ASAP. I hear there’s a lonely nap-lovin’ kitty in Texas by the name of Sancho who looks just like this handsome fellow below. I bet he doesn’t skimp on the naps.

Dear Peeps,

You’re cute, colorful and animal-shaped. Despite these excellent qualities, I have to be honest: I’ve never really liked you. You’re a little too much sickly-sweet marshmallow nonsense for one sitting. And besides, Cadbury milk chocolate caramel eggs beat the figurative pants off you any day. No offense. Then I saw the adorableness that is the picture below and decided that I must have you and all your colorful, useful awesomeness for our summer bonfires. So I scooped up four brightly colored packages of your comrades for $.50 a package the day after Easter. Looks like there is a use for you after all. You’re welcome!

Sincerely,

Lara

Dear Mother Nature,

Um, what’s up with the severe thunderstorms, flooding, lightening, hail, high winds, and tornado warnings this month? Cut it out, lady! You’re antsy after a long winter, we get it. So am I. But can’t you find a more constructive way to channel your energy? I don’t get to unleash my wrath and fury upon small villages when I’m feeling a little testy, so why should you? We’re a half inch away from matching Cincinnati’s biggest flooding record in history (the Great Ohio River Flood of 1937) and our weather woman tells us that with the next batch of severe storms that’ll be rolling through in about…oh, 12 minutes, we’ll exceed it in no time. This is not something to be proud of! (But thanks for the greenest grass in the U.S.!)

Yesterday after work Ted and I took a perfectly lovely walk trough the neighboring subdivision, enjoying splashes of sunlight and a cool breeze. Today I rode Carmela up and down the streets for a while in the sunshine before the clouds chased me inside. It was divine! Let’s have more of that and less of this.

Sincerely,

Lara

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Dear Travel,

WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO FREAKING EXPENSIVE!?

I want to go to Texas and devour margaritas, sweet tea, Bill Miller’s BBQ, real Tex-Mex cuisine, Blue Bell ice cream, my mom’s home-cooking, and snowcones from the Snow Cone Lady. I have a cat that is in desperate need of his mother and the poor little guy probably thinks I’ve forgotten all about him. I have family to enjoy and friends to go out with! I cannot afford $400 airfare! Get over yourself and stop being so expensive just because you can.

Also, we have a honeymoon we’d really like to take sometime before our one year anniversary. We’re thinking maybe Germany, with possible stopovers in Belgium or Switzerland, or an Alaskan cruise, or an Icelandic adventure. Now, let’s be clear. I saved for this shindig. I saved a more than appropriate amount of money for a great international honeymoon, but it’s looking like mere pocket change right now. $1,500 airfare per person to Frankfurt is unacceptable. So is $600 to get one person from Cincy to Seattle to catch a cruise to Alaska. So is my indecisiveness. Not only do I want to go everywhere and do everything, which is unrealistic and therefore problematic in and of itself, but these superbly obscene prices are depressing. Soooo, snap out of Travel Universe, okay? And thanks.

Sincerely,

Lara

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Dear People of Cincinnati,

Age 7 is entirely too old to be sucking on a pacifier, the term is not “cripple parking,” sipping wine while driving is totally illegal, museums are not clubs therefore they do not charge a “cover,” credit is not the ONLY form of currency in existence, and leggings still are not pants.

Sincerely,

Lara

Sorry, I don’t have a picture for this one. But if I did, can you imagine how great it would be? :-)