Dear Gas:
Hey, thanks! From where I’m sitting $3.79/gallon sure beats the $4.16/gallon I paid two weeks ago. :-) Keep up the good work.
Sincerely, Lara.
Dear Construction Season:
Bllllluuuuuggghhhh!!!!!!
Sincerely, Lara.
Dear Nordstrom Rack:
Please go out of business. Or at least start carrying more hideous merchandise. You are too tempting to me although you top my self-prescribed list of places I am not allowed to enter until we A) make more money and B) live in a less expensive house to rent. Although I beg of you to offer a bit of adorable and affordable honeymoon gear for the husband and I, I also wish you would not exist. It’s a complicated world we live in.
Sincerely, Lara.
Dear Anderson Township Public Swimming Pool:
Where the hell are you!?
Sincerely, Lara.
Dear Mama Spider:
Today I noticed that you are missing from the little spot where you and your nest reside on the inner hinge of our storm door. I’ve grown accustomed to your presence and to looking up at least four times a day to see if you are still there every single time I enter and exit. And you have been for at least two weeks….until today. Where did you go? This may sound quite contradictory considering I have an intense fear of your species, but I’ve grown rather fond of you and your little nook because at least I know exactly where you are. Please come back so I can continue to live in peace knowing exactly where you are and exactly where you are not (read: my bed).
Sincerely, Lara.
Dear Printers:
What. Gives. Do you not like us anymore? We’ve lost two of you in the past two weeks. Sure the office is hotter than blazes because we’re too cheap to turn on the a.c., but is crapping out on us the only way to work this through? We regularly maintenance you with fresh ink, we give you a safe home, we don’t overwork you, and when you do malfunction I’ve learned to harness my anger and not beat you senseless until you work again. I thought we had an agreement – and just because we had five of you doesn’t mean you all weren’t very special to us in your own way. In conclusion, please stop dropping like flies because printerless is a very inconvenient thing to be.
Sincerely, Lara.
P.S. You may be wondering why on earth a two-person family needs five printers. An excellent question. I had a printer and Ted had a printer and then we got married and we had two printers – it’s all very Brady Bunch of us. That’s pretty normal, right? Well, Ted also does a lot of high quality photo printing for theatre-related jobs, so while he was in grad school at MSU, in came the large-format photo printer for his company TOR Ventures. And when BoarsHead Theatre closed and the city was going to tear down the building, a perfectly functional ink jet desk printer and an extra large-scale plotter for printing light plots were left orphaned. Enter printers 4 and 5. Would you turn down a free plotter? No, I didn’t think so. So, we still have the plotter and the photo printer and my printer/copier/scanner, but I’d say the loss of two printers in two weeks is a little mysterious.
Anyway, Happy Friday! Today is living proof that it doesn’t rain in Cincinnati all the time. Just most of the time. Today is a lovely, hot, sunny day. In fact, I have a batch of peach tea brewing on the front porch right now. With any luck it will be tasty and spider-free when I go to retrieve it, just how I like it.
