Author: Lara

Yesterday at work I spent the day talking with my work friend Emily, who is getting married in June. Not to be confused with my other friend Emily who is getting married in June. The Ohio Emily, not the Texas one.

Anyhow.

She mentioned that for their honeymoon they had booked a Baltic Sea cruise.

I immediately went “OMGPolandRussiaLatviaFinlandSwedenTAKEMEWITHYOU!!!”

Then she mentioned that they could only do it because of how inexpensive it is to cruise right now, you know, after that Italian cruise ship ran aground a few months ago and everyone jumped ship. Apparently that’ll freak people out of booking cruises. So in an attempt to fill rooms, prices are dropping like flies.

Those were the magic words, all the convincing I needed that we the Baltic Sea was in the cards for us this summer!

And then, because I’m a glutton for punishment, I logged onto Royal Caribbean’s website and saw that it was only $894 per person. $894!!!! That’s SO cheap! SO cheap for an abroad cruise…even our Alaska cruise was several hundred dollars more expensive!

I texted Ted all the sweet details and said, “Sooooo, cruise?”

He responded, “HA!”

Then added, “If you can keep it under $1,000 per person, sure.”

So I checked airfare prices from Cincinnati to Stockholm, Sweden.

$1,300 per person.

INSANITY.

My dreams have been dashed, stomped on, torn to shreds and abandoned.

It was tragic.

Because – Poland, Russia, Sweden, Finland, and Latvia – really!? YES PLEASE.

So I filled my mind with thoughts of the bright blue skinny jeans I’ve been loving lately and am jonesing to buy when the time is right.

So I went searching online for those instead.

$174

Let’s be real here friends, my prom dresses cost less than $100.

If I’m going to shell out $174 for bright blue jeans, they better be magical.

I don’t mean they better look magical, although they damn well must.

I mean actually be magical.

Grant wishes and produce Genies and stuff.

$174 for jeans and $1,300 for a flight.

Pffffft.

So we settled for a split platter of nachos instead.

A fair compromise.

And don’t look up cruises, airfare, or skinny jeans unless you’re rolling in $$$ or are an utter glutton for punishment.

Wisdom for your Saturday.

Have a great weekend!

My favorite summer salad, best enjoyed outside on the patio in the comforting embrace of an Adirondack chair. Spring mix, goat cheese, strawberries, grilled chicken and pecans – no dressing required.

We are becoming water tester extraordinaires, thanks to Mav. Water testing happens at least once every other day in our house and our bar is littered with test tubes, chemical bottles, instruction booklets, and test result charts. It’s kind of fun.

For Easter I dyed the eggs psychedelic style – just add 3 Tbsp. of white vinegar to each tablet, 1/2 cup of hot water, and 1 tsp. of melted butter. Groovy. Easter breakfast in my family was always had-boiled eggs with Polish sausage. If I’m feeling particularly crafty, I might try silk-dyed eggs next year.

And, finally, Mav.

This is all you get of Girlfriend this week. Mostly because this is all we’re getting of Girlfriend lately as well. She’s a trooper and has been enduring a pretty wicked going-on-2-week nitrite spike as we cycle her tank, so her preference has been to stay in her cave, rearrange all the gravel, and dig to China. We’re hoping the spike starts to taper off soon so we can see more of our sweet, playful Mav again. As soon as her tank is fully cycled we’re thinking of adding in a fish or two for her to stalk.

How was your weekend?

I don’t know where.

Easter Island.

St. Lucia.

Cabo maybe.

But wherever it is, I respectfully request it back.

Or I respectually request that my body join it.

Yeah, option two.

Anyhow, this week Ted warned me to be very very careful cleaning Mav’s tank and not to, under any circumstances, get any – not even a tiny morsel – of her gravel down the garbage disposal. Because, apparently, gravel destroys garbage disposals…or something. And I was very very careful. But I’d forgotten that a few days prior that conversation, whilst fishing an uneaten algae round out of the bottom of her tank, I’d also snatched up a few teeny tiny microscopic little pieces of gravel. Not thinking, I dumped it all down the drain. No biggie.

While Ted was at work the next day I flipped the switch to the garbage disposal.

No sound. Hmmm.

“Hello….Mr. Garbage Disposal? You okay down there?”

*gurgle gurgle*

Hmmm. Poor little guy must be sick. I’ll just call the office on my way to teach, I thought.

“Hi Kevin, this is Lara from Apartment 119. Just calling to put in a maintenance request for our garbage disposal, which doesn’t seem to be working. Thanks!”

When I arrived home I spotted the tell-tale neon green maintenance slip taped to the door. The “Repaired” box was checked, and under “Additional Comments” it simply said:

“Removed gravel from garbage disposal, dumbass. – Brad”

It didn’t really say dumbass, but it probably should have.

Because, really.

Brad was likely wondering why, how, and again, Dear God WHY is there gravel down the garbage disposal, and doesn’t every idiot this side of the Mississippi know that if you throw rocks down a garbage disposal it will make it croak? Women.”

And Yesterday, Easter Sunday, my computer, which we’d just gotten back from a long therapeutic stay at the Apple Store for repairs and the installation of a new logic board, began acting up again instantly, as soon as I turned it on. Instantly.

And of course I’m not going to stand for that kind of tomfoolery in this house.

So I immediately backed up my files, loaded the laptop into the car, schlepped 45 minutes over to the Kenwood Towne Center where the nearest Apple Store is located….only to find the mall closed for Easter.

As if I wasn’t ticked off before.

You see, I love Easter. It’s a beautiful occasion. And I’m all for celebrating it, at home, with loved ones….not out in public. In fact, I was tickled to not be scheduled to work this Easter like I was last Easter – although the egg hunt in the Cleopatra exhibit last Easter was quite joyful. I’m appreciative to have the day off to go to church and be with Ted. I think everyone should have Easter Sunday off. And I do feel bad for all the people who have to work on Easter Sunday, especially if they’d much rather be spending the time with their families or at church or something.

But, here’s the thing. Since when does the public observe Christian holidays? The last time I checked, every darn movie theatre in the U.S. of A. was open on Thanksgiving Day and Christmas Day and New Years Day. And nearly every single store in existence, certainly all the big malls, open in the afternoon on Thanksgiving and Christmas, which as a general blanket statement, I believe are more widely celebrated holidays than Easter. So, while I’m happy that the mall employees got the day off (silver lining, folks, silver lining), I’m miffed that a mall that is open on Thanksgiving and Christmas, is closed on Easter. It’s surprising in such a secular world.

And you know what? This is totally my fault. I mean, what kind of a person doesn’t call ahead to make sure a place is open.

Especially if you have to drive 45 minutes to get there.

Especially if you’re making a special trip just for that.

Espically if it’s a holiday.

Growing up in Boerne a.k.a The Sticks, which was about 45 minutes from any form of civilization when we first moved there when I was in the second grade, I know that you always, always call ahead. Just to make sure.

I know that.

Like I said….Cabo.

So, yeah, totally my fault.

But I was still ticked.

So instead, I thought of the silver lining. All those employees at home with their families today, probably outside enjoying this gorgeous day. The beautiful drive up there on a crystal clear Highway 275 with my windows open and the wind blowing and the sun shining. The great morning with Ted, eating dyed hard-boiled eggs and Polish sausage and going to church and talking to family and playing board games. And finally, the Kenwood area Trader Joe’s I went into to buy some healthy 100% fruit and veggie fruit roll-up’s and dark chocolate almond Lacey’s cookies, because dammit, I wasn’t going to waste my time or gas money for nothing!

I also washed my car this weekend without looking at the weather first to verify a zero percent chance of rain in the next three days.

And, Lord have Mercy, we all know that you never do that.

Sorry, Cincinnati. You might want to pack your umbrellas.

Brain….take me with you next time.

Have I mentioned how much I…

1. Love the smell of charcoal grills fired up by the neighbors on sunny spring evenings when I can sit outside on our porch in the Adirondack chair and enjoy it all?

2. Love Mav’s little blue pinchers and bulging black eyes popping out from under her rock cave to say hello when I arrive home?

3. Love my sweet and humorous husband?

Oh, I have? Good.

Because I still love these things.

Also…

1. I love the bright plastic Easter eggs that are decorating our back yard, no doubt hidden for some little kid to find tomorrow morning.

2. The psychedelic Easter eggs I am about to dye!

3. The awesome summer salad I will consume for dinner – spring mix lettuce, strawberries, pecans, goat cheese and grilled chicken.

What do you love today?

So, the other day, on a whim, I was in the little Country Fresh Produce Market that I prowl on the regular and happened upon a spaghetti squash. I like regular squash, and acorn squash works nicely in many autumn recipes, and I even like butternut squash in Butternut Squash Apple Cider Soup (as long as it’s from The Cookery in Door County not my own frightening concoction, because that was a fail of epic proportions). I’d read somewhere that spaghetti squash is often used as an alternative to pasta noodles for diabetics or other people who are watching their weight and/or carb intakes.

So I bought the little guy.

At the very least, I thought, my dear friend Katie, who has a toddler with severe food allergies and has become a master chef at whipping up healthy, tasty meals using alternative ingredients, would be able to shine some light on what I could do with it, if I got stumped.

So home it came.

And I searched some recipes until I found two that appealed to me.

I waited until I had a night when Ted was working late and would, upon his return home, be gleeful that I did not subject him to the perils of trying sometime new and healthy.

And I made Spaghetti Squash Au Gratin and Spaghetti Squash with Pizza Basil.

I cut the sucker in half using a pick ax (well, just about), gutted the seeds, and put it in a covered microwave safe dish for 10 minutes with 1/4″ of water in the bottom. It cooked up beautifully. I then used a fork to remove the little spaghetti strings of squash flesh from the shell and put half in two separate bowls.

In the first bowl, the Spaghetti Squash Au Gratin, I mixed light sour cream, light 2% shredded cheddar cheese, light butter and cooked onion slivers, red pepper flakes, thyme, salt, and pepper in with the spaghetti squash.

In the second bowl, the Spaghetti Squash with Pizza Basil, I mixed pizza sauce, 2% pizza cheese, a freshly diced garlic clove, and a handful of cut basil ribbons from my basil plant in with the spaghetti squash.

I put both dishes, uncovered, in a 375° oven for 15 minutes.

The Au Gratin was good, but the Pizza Basil was out of this world awesome.

I’d make it again in a heartbeat. Healthy, low carb, light, easy to make, and really really good…..a winner!

I’ve also been a fan of making zucchini pizzas in the oven this week, which are also healthy, low carb, light, and easy to make. I make them with zucchini slices, 2% pizza cheese, pizza sauce, light turkey mini pepperoni’s, and black olive slices.

In other news, last night Ted and I went to see BAMM at CCM. BAMM is the moving light show that the lighting students do as sort of a final project in the moving light programming class. It’s super awesome. All these hugely expensive moving lights are donated to them for use in BAMM by one of the big name lighting companies and each student in the class programs the lighting for two songs – one of their choice and one of their professor’s choice. They have all these awesome lights which can do a million, trillion different colors, patterns, shapes, and angles and more, and the hazer machine fills the room with a nice subtle fog for effect, and the music plays and the lights twirl and it’s like being at a concert…except these kids are, like, sophomores in college. It’s pretty phenomenal to see what can be done with moving lights and little programming talent! Lots of fun!

Also, the boys at CCM that made that incredible pixel-mapping video for the ETC (Electronic Theatre Controls) contest to win their school a free lighting console….you know, the one I posted on my blog and begged you all to watch their video and go vote for them because they worked so hard and did a really fantastic job?

They won 2nd place out of all the entries in the country!

And the school who won 1st place didn’t choose the best best lighting board for their prize…instead they wisely chose the light board which would actually serve their purposes and work best for them at their college instead of just taking home the best one out there that they don’t even have enough equipment to support. Smart.

Which means that the CCM boys got to take home the best best one…the Eos. The Eos is a $40,000-$70,000 light board, depending on which one you get…it’s the kind that is used in major Broadway houses. And they won that sucker for their school so that they have something real and awesome and modern to use and learn and practice on before they get out there in the real world and have to use it.

Sweet, right?

So, a few things…

1. I love half-price sushi date nights with my Ohio BFF Allyson.

Love.

They are good for my soul, my well-being, and my snark.

Allyson is an excellent friend for many reasons.

Too numerous to name.

But here are a few.

She’s from Texas. She is an actress and theatre artist. She loves Jeni’s ice cream and margaritas as much as I do. She likes trying new things and going on grand adventures. She has a ridiculous bank full of hilarious stories from her past and present that is absolutely unending. She has an open heart. She is a good friend. And she is strong, vibrant, and fearlessly in hot pursuit of her dreams.

And she is teaching me to be a shameless self-advocate for myself.

You see, I’m not always very good at standing up for myself. I’m not always very good at voicing my needs, or speaking up confidently for the things I want, or being clear about things I don’t like. I can think of times in the past when I have spoken up, but more often than not, I’m fairly non-confrontational, which is fine sometimes. But sometimes it isn’t – like when it comes to boldly advocating for myself and my career by saying “I want this and I’m going to make it happen” or “I am right for this job.” These are things I can afford not to be shy about.

But whenever we hang out and spend hours talking and talking and talking, I always leave thinking “Yes, I CAN do this and I WILL go after what I want because, dammit, I deserve it!”

It’s awesome.

2. Allyson shared with me a great story about Mexican Food and Ohioans that only fellow Texans will get.

It completely made my day. Seriously, I laughed, and I cried and I sympathized.

So I’m sharing her story here.

Ohio has this really bad habit of screwing up Mexican food.

They use salsa on enchiladas and call it enchilada sauce (it’s not), they pour fake nacho cheese or Velveeta into a bowl and call it queso (it’s not), they routinely mislabel tacos as quesadillas on menus (they’re not), and don’t know a chalupa from a soft taco (monumental difference!).

It’s obnoxious and heartbreaking.

Nothing bothers me more than Ohio’d Mexican food when I’m on the prowl for the real deal.

So Allyson was at this work conference today and there was a Mexican buffet. A group of ladies ahead of her stood hovering over a steaming tray of enchiladas, debating about what they were. Allyson told them they were enchiladas, because, well, they obviously were enchiladas. The women were not convinced and told her that they looked good, but that they didn’t think they were enchiladas.

Of course they were enchiladas.

Then Allyson watched in horror as they decided to try the “not enchiladas.”

They poked at them.

Then to add salt to the wound, they scooped them out of the pan in chunks like a casserole, cutting them horizontally instead of taking one whole enchilada roll and putting in on their plate.

GAH! They destroyed them. A perfectly good enchilada!

Total sacrilege.

As a Texan, you can see why she was utterly horrified and why I was, in turn, also utterly horrified by this.

We both thew our arms in the air and screamed together on the outdoor patio of the sushi restaurant in outrage.

Sometimes Ohioans are just too much.

3. I am in love with the blue and citron color combination right now.

As in, I would love to have a bit of spare cash to add these bright, fun, and comfy pieces to my wardrobe for summer!

And then to fix my Buick’s check engine light, replace the Buick’s shocks, and beef up our savings account while I continue to work four jobs for a minimal to non-existent salary.

But first, the goods.

I know, they’re bright.

I get it.

But I sort of really love them together.

Thoughts?