T&L

After a lot of consideration, Ted and I have decided that the time is right for us to expand our little family of two to a family of three. So please welcome:

Maverick

Name: Blue Crayfish (freshwater) or Blue Lobster (saltwater)

Scientific Name: Procambarus alleni

But we call her: Maverick (Mav)

Life expectancy: 2 – 5 years

Max size: 8”

Eats: Anything she can get her pinchers on. Favorites include raw zucchini, frozen peas, lettuce, cooked cocktail shrimp, crab/lobster/catfish/shrimp pellets for bottom-dwellers, algae rounds (her true favorite!), bloodworms, krill, feeder fish, live aquatic plants, and slow tank-mates.

Habitat: Aquatic, but she can live out of water as long as her gills stay damp.

Coloration: Naturally blue, but to aide in retaining her bright hue we added gravel that is similar in color and vibrancy to her shell, and we were sure to give her a slate hiding cave where she feels safe and secure, as stress is rumored to reduce a cray’s vividness and possibly coloration.

Molting: Crays will molt their shell once every few months as they grow. Her old shell will remain in the tank for up to one week after for her to eat as an intake of calcium. Cray’s feel especially vulnerable when they are molting, therefore having a cave to hide in helps them feel a little less endangered.

Habits: Crays make a hobby of stalking and swiping at unsuspecting fish, climbing rocks, scaling the tank’s plants/filter tube/heater, digging and burrowing in the gravel, rearranging their tank decorations, moving gravel across the tank piece by piece, hording food, and swimming really freakin’ fast using their tail as a scoop to propel them forward or backward.

Tank-mates: Crays enjoy the fine art of catching and snacking on any tank-mates that are slower or dumber than their pinchers. But they will also be mercilessly plucked apart while molting by any tank-mates that are more aggressive than they are. Crays are also not very kind to one another. Many crays live alone for this reason. The best tank-mates are small, fast, top-dwelling, non-aggressive fish that the cray (try as they may!) cannot catch but who will not be aggressive toward the cray when they are molting – like marble hatchets.

Qualities: Luckily, crays are fairly adaptable creatures. Though, like any fish, they prefer certain pH levels and water temperatures over others, they are able to adapt well to different conditions so long as they are acclimated properly and the elements remain stable and do not fluctuate vastly or frequently. Stability takes priority over a perfect test kit reading any day.

Aquarium: 20 gallon freshwater – mix of about ½ tap water and ½ reverse osmosis (RO) water – with a lid because it’s totally necessary! Cray’s are major escape artists. “February 26th, day 173, plan Q…” Ted and I joke about Mav’s escape plots.

Filter: ChemiPure’s Carbon Ion filter and a regular polyfiber filter.

Additives: 2 mL of SeaChem Prime, 2 mL of a tap water dechlorinator, and the occasional dose of liquid calcium for invertebrates to keep her shell healthy.

Lighting: Fluorescent, about 6 hours a day, with the tank situated out of direct sunlight.

Tank Accessories: Filter, pump, submersible heater, digital thermometer, and wall bubbler.

Substrate: 25 lbs of blue and white gravel mixed, thoroughly rinsed with no soap.

Decorations: Gravel, 4 artificial plants, and a slate rock/cave.

Aeration: Pump with under-gravel wall bubbler to relieve water pressure and oxygenate the tank with bubbles.

Cleaning: We’re working our way through the first “ammonia to nitrite to nitrate” cycle, so after this first cycle is complete we’ll be doing a bi-weekly or monthly 10-20% water changes with RO water, gravel vacuuming, and scrubbing the inside of the tank with an algae pad. Filter gets changed once every six months.

Testing supplies: API Freshwater Master Liquid Test Kit to test for ammonia, nitrite, nitrates, and pH. Because our tap water is so freakishly alkaline, we have to use the API High-Range pH test kit for pH’s of 7.6-8.8 (which is actually saltwater tank territory, not freshwater….thanks, Ohio).

Temperature: Range of about 55-75° is ideal. Ours is set to stay around 71°.

pH: Typically a range between 7.0 and 7.6 is ideal. Crays prefer slightly cooler, harder, and more alkaline water. But because Cincinnati has insanely hard water with very a high pH value, our tank is sitting between a 7.8 and 8.0, even with the addition of ½ RO water – which generally has a neutral pH of 6.8-7.0 – to lower the tank’s pH. Researching all this crap for the past two weeks, attempting to remedy it naturally through much trial and error (which created an unfortunate bacterial bloom that forced us to completely flush the tank and sent us right back to square one), and then just accepting it because that’s really all we can do at this point without chemical interference – which can negatively effect stability and lead to pH spikes and crashes – has been a battle of epic proportions. I’ve learned more about RO water, pH, kH, gH levels, and the inner-workings of the nitrogen cycle than I ever wanted to know.

Acclimation: When first brought Mav home from the store we floated the plastic bag with her in it in the tank for about 1 hr so the water temperatures could assimilate. Then every 5 minutes for the next 30 minutes we added a small amount of tank water to the bag so she could adjust to the different water quality and chemical balances in our water versus her tank’s water at the store.

And I thought getting a fish was as easy as it was when I was a kid – buy tank, fill with faucet water, throw in some gravel, and insert fish. HA.

I love her eyes – they’re so big and awesome!

So what do you think of our new addition?

The other night Ted called me on his way home from work:

T: How are you doing?

L: I’m having a mini-life crisis.

T: We are not getting a cat.

L: I know.

T: Okay.

L: Am I boring?

T: Of course you are.

L: No, really?

T: No!

L: Okay.

T: I’ll be home in time for dinner and Wheel of Fortune at 7. I think tonight’s the lucky night we’ll win the prize puzzle vacation!

L: I know! I feel it too!

(We did not win it. Yet.)

I think being boring is something everyone starts to ponder at a certain age…usually the age where you’re working hard, working often, trying to make a name for yourself in your career, save some money, get yourself in order a little bit…then all of the sudden something jolts you and you think, “Wait a minute! Am I starting to get old and boring?”

A kid in one of my acting classes – one kid out of the 200 kids and nine classes I work with every week – quit the optional after-school program because she thought the theatre class was boring. Not that I was boring, but that the class was boring. One kid out of 200 decided theatre wasn’t her thing. Totally fair. Sports weren’t my thing for the longest time and I’m sure there was a person out there – ahem, Ted – who could not fathom how sports could possibly be boring. I always work very hard to create lesson plans that are highly active, engaging, challenging, and full of games, scenes, and lots of variety – I want my kids to learn but I strive to make theatre for them as fun and exciting as it was for me as a kid. My classes and directing style has been described as many, many things, but boring has never been one of them. But, simply put, not every activity is right for everyone. I know this. But somehow, in my fragile state of being sick, overworked, and underpaid (like everyone else, right?) my mind translated this to “OMG you’re boring!”

After I fretted and pondered and considered and mused and worried and panicked and talked myself through my crisis for the next thirty minutes, I came to the conclusion that I, that we, are many things, but boring isn’t quite one of them.

Boring people don’t work in professional theatre for a living. Boring people do not book the glacier trek, dogsledding excursion, and extreme water rafting and volcano exploratory adventure via 4×4 on their Alaskan honeymoon (for future reference, they book the casino salmon bake). Boring people are not up for traveling the world or applying for jobs in different parts of the country on a daily basis. Boring people do not do things spur of the moment, randomly, as we often find ourselves doing.

We may cook dinner together every night and settle in for a solid round of Wheel of Fortune like the old folks do, but we are decisively not boring. And even if we are a little bit boring every now and then, that’s okay too :-)

Do you ever get the idea that you’re boring? How do you feel about it? What do you do to change it? Do you want to change it?

Late in the week we took a short road trip from Cincy to Chicago for my grandpa’s memorial service and burial. Though it wasn’t the most joyous of occasions, it was a beautiful service to celebrate his life and we got to catch up with many family members I haven’t seen since I was a little girl and who have never met Ted.

Our drive to Chicago was rainy but thankfully uneventful. We’re pretty good at keeping each other entertained on road trips. We arrived early afternoon and met my parents at my grandma’s new memory care residential home. Though grandma is understandably a little bit peeved about the move from her home to a residential home, it’s a very nice place with lots of activities, her own room, and the staff that cares for her is excellent. I haven’t seen her since my wedding shower back in September of 2010 and since she was unable to travel for our wedding, it was also her first time meeting Ted. It was really nice to see her again, and though her memory is definitely on the decline, I’m glad to see she hasn’t lost her spunk (she informed us that it was hotter than a b*tch in her room and that she doesn’t like being around all these old zombies).

After our visit with grandma we went to visit with my Aunt Penny and cousin Tammy. Tammy is in the late stages of lung cancer brought on by a disease she had back as a teenager. After many rounds of chemo, the tumor is blocking her airway and there’s not much more they can do for her. She is under in-home hospice care now, but fortunately she isn’t in too much pain. Ted and I enjoyed a really nice two-hour visit with them that I’m sure we’ll always cherish. It was a truly great visit.

After our visits we met my mom, dad, sister, and nephews in downtown Naperville for a wonderful dinner at one of Ted’s most favorite restaurants – Ted’s Montana Grill. Obviously. They’re a nice sit-down restaurant that serves gourmet bison burgers with ingredients like garlic aioli, jalapeños, cilantro, arugula, fried onion straws, pepper jack cheese, blackberry jam, fried egg, and of course a selection of less adventurous ingredients as well. Bison burgers are fantastic! And the pickled cucumbers, fresh lemonade, and fresh seasonable apple crisp is so delicious and so huge that three people can happily split a single serving. Again, great food and a great time with family.

We checked in at our hotel in Oakbrook with a glorious, luxurious king sized bed with a million pillows and like the party animals we are, we were asleep by 10 o’clock after a few episodes of Big Bang Theory.

In the morning we had grandpa’s memorial service at the Catholic church where he and grandma were married, raised and schooled their sons, and where grandma’s memorial service was in 2008. In fact the cross that hung above the alter in the church was donated by grandma and grandpa as a lasting gift to that church. It was a beautiful service to honor his life. A small handful of grandpa’s relatives and dearest friends were in attendance and a nice choir full of people who knew grandma and grandpa sang. My dad, my uncle and I did the readings and my sister lead the singers and sang some lovely solos including Ave Maria for the service. After the service we drove to the cemetery to bury grandpa next to grandma and to visit the graves of my grandma’s sisters and great grandparents. Then we all went out to eat at one of my grandpa’s favorite restaurants – Sawa’s Old Warsaw Polish Smorgasboard. We feasted on a buffet of Polish beer, whipped potatoes, stuffed cabbage rolls, pierogi, potato pancakes with sour cream, polish sausage, sauerkraut, apple blintzes, beer battered cod, kopytka, pickled beets, and barley and smoked pork cream soup. It was all unbelievably delicious and such a nice way to pay homage to our heritage and sit with family and remember all our good times with grandma and grandpa. I got to see some great aunts and uncles, my uncle, and a few of grandpa’s friends who haven’t seen me since I had blonde ringlets back in the late 80s and early 90s. It was just so nice to see the family again.

We drove back to Cincy through the Indiana windmill farms as the sun set. We are so thankful for such a beautiful couple of days and the opportunity to enjoy so much family.

So I’m teaching theatre classes and directing plays at another new school in Cincinnati for the next 8 weeks. If you’re counting I’m up to 9 different classes of kids a week at 3 different schools. FYI. This does not include my other three jobs. I look forward to bedtime more than most people I know.

This newest school is the Academy of World Languages (AWL). I know. It’s awesome. While I really enjoy all the kids I work with at my other two schools and am really lucky to have such well-behaved, hard-working kids this semester, the five classes we’re working with at AWL are just so interesting!! It’s a multi-national PreK-8th grade magnet school in Cincinnati where, in addition to the standard Ohio core curriculum, the students learn and strengthen their skills in Russian, Japanese, Chinese, Italian, and Arabic. I have a feeling that German and Polish are not taught there because there are already German and Polish language schools for children in Cincinnati, and French and Spanish are taught at least to some extent in most area high schools. The kids come from hundreds of countries all over the world and English is the second language of approximately 40% of the students. Many are multi-lingual.

Most are completely fluent in English, with the exception of one little Nepalese boy in one of our classes who is new to the school and speaks very limited English. To make up for his lack of English comprehension and ability to express his thoughts in a language his peers and teacher can understand, he just smiles a whole lot, which is really sweet. Fortunately, one other girl in his class is Nepalese and can help translate for him. And another girl in the class, who is not Nepalese but is apparently fluent in several languages, can speak his language as well and she helps translate too. Another girl we work with is from a country where first and last names are reversed, so on the roll sheet instead of “last name, first name” her name appears as “first name, last name.” On the subject of names, I’m learning how to pronounce some very cool names from all around the world! They’re all so unique to me that pronouncing them correctly and keeping them straight among the five classes of students has been a wonderful challenge and learning experience. But they’re all very beautiful names. I’ll have to do a post soon of all the names I’ve learned since I started teaching in Ohio. Talk about diversity! I’ve taught students named with combinations of vowels and consonants I didn’t even know could be made into a sound when placed next to each other. I’m not saying it’s always easy to understand every word that everyone says, or that I get their names right even 50% of the time, but I’m really enjoying working with all of those sweet kids so far!

Many of the students wear scarves or turbans on their heads and a few wear gold nose rings, earrings, or other jewelry common in their culture. On every object around the school – doors, cabinets, bathrooms – a label for the English word appears, followed by the word written in Russian, Chinese, Japanese, and Arabic. Another cool thing I’ve noticed is how artistic and creative these kids are. The students’ artwork displayed in the hallways in absolutely phenomenal for their age. They learn all sorts of wonderful music and practice with musical instruments from countries all over the world. And the ideas they’ve given us for the plays they are writing are just so darn creative! I can’t wait to start rehearsals with them and to see how we can all interact onstage.

It’s just a very, very cool experience and I’m really loving being immersed in all the culture, creativity, and learning that goes on there. I’m so glad that Cincinnati has a school like this!

Do you have a part of your job that you’re particularly loving lately?

Some things in life mean more than others.

Family.

It’s hard to be happy, but I am thankful that Grandpa is back with Grandma once again, where he truly wants to be.

So yesterday after I pulled myself together from the epic “working outside in subzero temps” debacle of 2012 and got over my raging, though kind of unfounded (in retrospect, of course) anger, I had a lovely evening. I met my friend Allyson for the opening night performance of Henry VIII: All Is True at Cincinnati Shakespeare Company. We both thoroughly enjoyed the show and the ladies’ costumes were to die for! This Shakespeare history play is a must see, especially if you’re a history buff or, you know, just obsessed with Henry and his litany of wives like I am. Especially that sly Anne Boleyn – what a sneak! It was a very nice evening at the theatre with a good friend, despite the bitter cold and snow. And this morning between a theatre workshop engagement and my shift at the museum I met Ted for a lunch date, which is always a welcome (and tasty) way to sneak in some time with the dude.

But onto what’s really been tossing around in my head lately:

Courage
Confidence
Comparing

I’ve been reflecting on some things lately, especially now that I’m really pushing myself back into acting and applying for full time professional theatre jobs instead of four theatre part-timers. I think courage, confidence, and comparing are three things I’ve struggled with for a while, at least since college. But this year I’m making a concerted effort to be more courageous in the face of things that scare me – like driving in the snow and on potentially icy roads, auditioning at equity houses, teaching theatre to very young children who are not in the age range I most often work with, and applying for the good theatre jobs that I really want, even though I fear rejection. I’ve done all four of these things already in 2012 and I like how it feels, how I’m already less afraid now than before because I’ve had some practice. It hasn’t been easy and it’s still a struggle, but having courage feels good.

I am also working to build up my confidence, because I think somewhere along the way I might have lost it. Theatre is a business of rejection – we all know that. Lots and lots of “no’s” before you finally get your “yes”. Maybe once upon a time I got hurt by the “no’s” or maybe I got used to being around super talented people all the time and since I was so young and still learning, I feared that I wasn’t one of them. But I am. I can be. Of only I start trusting myself again, and believing in my talents and skills again, and putting myself out here again – this time armed with the knowledge that “no” isn’t bad and I shouldn’t let “no” diminish my confidence or make me forget all the cool things I have already accomplished or still want to do. “No” is just “You did your best and there’s something even better out there for you. You just haven’t found it yet.”

It took me years to reach this point, but I am so relieved that I can honestly say that I am no longer hurt or offended or embarrassed by “no” because I believe that it brings me one step closer to the right job or the right part for me, which is what I really want. Not being your own worst critic or so hard on yourself feels mighty fine!

And that brings me to comparing. In the past three years I have had the privilege of working with the cream of the theatre crop. Ungodly talented and incredibly kind directors, actors, and administrators that I looked up to, learned from, and am grateful to have friended. Being around such talented, funny, and good-hearted people is wonderful, but also a little daunting, and the competition can be terrifying. So this year, in addition to being courageous enough to confidentially do the things that scare me, I’m going to work on being more fair to myself and not comparing my talents or achievements to the talents or achievements of others. I’m good at some things and others are good at other things. End of story. There really is no way to fairly compare something so abstract, so I’m just not going to compare anymore. I can only compare my work to my work, and so I will stick with that.

And I have a sneaking suspicion that these 3 C’s just might work hand-in-hand. Without the comparison nonsense I will feel more confident in my abilities, and the more confident I feel, the more easily it comes to be courageous and defeat my own fears. And who doesn’t want to befriend or work with or hire someone like that?

I’m really excited to feel the effects of positive change this year! Between these and my other resolutions (see my previous posts for more on that!) I’m hoping for a joyful 2012. It won’t be without its trials, I’m sure, but I can only control me and how I face those trials. And so that’s what I will work on.

How was your Friday night? Have you had any deep thoughts or revelations lately?

Friend:  So, what are your New Years resolutions this year?

Me: I was actually going to blog about that today, but then I didn’t want to get out my iPad at work and type it all in, so I thought a post about my awesome paper wig would be sufficient.

***

There’s nothing like a good friend to hold you accountable.

I did make a list of attainable aspirations this year. I figure there’s no sense in listing an endless litany of lofty goals that I will only feel disappointed about when they don’t happen, so I stuck to the realistic this year – stuff we can, and want, to make happen. Then I took a look at that list and realized I could divide all my goals into 5 action-driven keys words. And the system made sense to me, and I felt excited about my goals, not overwhelmed.

So my words for 2012 are…play, save, give, strive, and fit.

And here’s a quick run-down of what I’m geared up to accomplish in 2012:

• Secure a good full-time professional theatre job, or even two part-time theatre jobs (just not four, please, not four). So far I’ve been able to do this every year since I graduated college…I’ve been so lucky! I’m hoping this luck holds out for me!
• Design and launch my professional portfolio and website for acting and theatre education
• Act in at least one play and one musical this year. I seriously need to get back into this!
• Finish up getting the last of my EMC points and finally go union by joining the Actor’s Equity Association (woo!!)
• Get back into dancing by taking tap, ballet, and rhythm & motion classes
• Design a Blurb photo book for our time living in Cincy
• Revamp the ol’ blog
• Journal five things every day that I am thankful for
• Donate or volunteer at least six times this year – more if I can possibly make it happen!
• Engage my social side a little more often than…well, never…by making a point to go out with my friends at least once a month (I’m surprisingly bad at this)
• Take some trips this year: one to see my family, one to see Ted’s family, and two trips just for us – one will be a weekend in Door County for our wedding anniversary, and the other will, hopefully, be to somewhere a little more exotic!
• Get our affairs in order. This includes our wills, powers of attorney, medical release forms, retirement accounts, insurances and all that grown-up mumbo-jumbo that we really should have figured out by now.
• Add appropriate amounts to our retirement savings account, 6-month emergency living expenses saving account, and trip savings account. I suppose starting the last two accounts would be a good first step.
• Get back into exercising when it gets a bit warmer out (we don’t have bikes and roller blades for nothing!) and maintain my weight (basically, I just need to stay the hell out of The Bonbonerie bakery and I’ll be good to go).

Yesterday afternoon I met my Texas-native, Shakespeare-lovin’, fashion-forward, margarita-drinkin’ Cincy friend Allyson for a Friday afternoon cupcake date (which must become a weekly tradition!) at The Bonbonerie in O’Bryonville, an amazing bakery in Cincinnati that bakes up the most delectable fine pastries, sweets, and afternoon tea that you could ever hope to experience. I was so overwhelmed by all the tasty and, really really pretty choices that I ordered two of the most delicious looking confections before I even knew what was happening. I had a freshly torched vanilla bean creme brulee and a salted caramel chocolate cupcake, and Allyson had a slice of the most epic opera cream chocolate cake I have ever laid eyes on. We were served on fancy china and we savored every bite while we dished about acting, Shakespeare, auditions, the hunt for theatre jobs, new years resolutions, our aspirations for the year, new apartments, swoon-worthy yet budget-friendly decorations, significant others, and other such lovely topics.

It. Was. Divine.

I could eat that creme brulee every day of my life. And I don’t think a cupcake and some solid, uplifting girl talk once a week would kill me either.

That same night Allyson brought her boyfriend Aaron over for some homemade margaritas, guacamole, pizza, and a friendly Wii gaming competition. She also brought me flowers, which melted my heart.

Creme brulee, salted caramel, margaritas, guacamole, and flowers all in one day?

I’m a lucky girl!

And my wonderful Christmas presents from Ted arrived this week! Do you want to know what I got!?

Yeah, amazing! I chose the awesome cute and comfy Pumas I wear every single day to run errands, teach dance, and basically live in, and this great leather ochre-colored Fossil crossbody purse to replace my current purse, which is in a horrific state of decay and needs to be retired ASAP. I love them both!!

And then Ted surprised me with one more unexpected gift…the pretty forest green leather Fossil wallet I’d also been eyeing! Best husband ever.

So lucky!

And I finally used that $50 museum gift shop certificate that I needed to deplete by the end of the month. Contrary to my silly musings, I did not clean the gift shop out of 75 rock candy sticks to make into a dazzling sugar-chandelier for New Years Eve – though that is a truly epic idea. I settled on two creative play/storytelling games that I can use as teaching aides when I’m coaching theatre classes or workshops, a coin robot building kit and a Titanic documentary DVD for Ted & I to enjoy on a geeky date night (Friend Olympics: Ted is a Titanic information fanatic and a coin collector), and of course, 5 rock candy sticks. Because you knew I wasn’t going to leave that gift shop without them.

This morning I helped out with two neat theatre classes for kids at this great old barn in Mariemont (one of our absolute favorite Cincinnati neighborhoods) that was renovated to become a sweet little cultural arts center, rental facility, and gallery space. The architecture of the building itself was a sight to behold and I love what they did with the renovation in terms of the flooring, the paint colors, and the track lighting. It was such a fun, unique, relaxing space to teach in! I could get used to teaching in a space like that. The classes we taught were very cool too. One was a science in theatre class where, using science and the three states of matter (solid, liquid, and gas), the kids learned about how we do special effects in the theatre. We played with lab coats, beakers, dry ice, water, food coloring, a slinky, hangers, tambourines, and more to teach the kids about the states of matter and how we can use them to create different effects and moods onstage, and also a bit about sound waves and vibrations and creative ways to create sound effects depending on the states of matter. They finished off the class making up a scene to perform using their new science knowledge to create their own special effects. Not a bad way to spend a morning!

I love when I get to relish in pretty things, and tasty treats, and creativity!

What fun things have you done lately?